jueves, 30 de agosto de 2007

Meeting Sofía left me with a broken heart

Sofía is one of those names that in its five letters embodies everything that is meaningful and beautiful... However, yesterday I met a Sofía, and all I could see was pain and suffering. We met at the nail place; we were both getting a manicure and pedicure. We talked about what color each of us was going to choose: she wanted pink and I wanted wicked...

She seemed very happy, totally unaware of her reality....but I was not, how could I be? I saw the shadow of that evil illness all over again. But she does not understand what is happening to her. She is already very skinny; the color of her face is gone, and in its place there is a sort of transparent color -one can see her veins making their ways as tinny blue rivers over her small body. Her hair is completely gone -she was wearing a pink bandanna to cover the boldness of her scalp. In her chest, there was a small tube; her lips were chapped -it seemed that she just got out of the hospital, but by her demeanor one would never have known that. She was very happy getting her manicure, and wearing her pinkish nail polish, with a tiny rose on one of her fingers.


It was great spending time with Sofía, but knowing that she is sick broke my heart. I stumbled across too many open wounds... I relived my friend Ida's calvary all over again. Sofía is too small to battle this monster. She is only four :-(. She asked if I was four too, and when I told her my age, she thought that I was very old... I hope she gets to be this old and healthy... and for me, I hope that writing out my experience with Sofía free me from the pain it left in my heart...

10 comentarios:

  1. I understand very well your feelings. Sofia is just your friend. Imagine living somewhere similar with somebody, more close to you, part of you. That is me right now. Never will be any "post" about it, because there is not one word capable of describing these feelings, this fear, this impossiblity to do nothing. have a nice weekend, enjoy the holiday!

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  2. liberarnos de ese dolor nos haria perder poco a poco la esencia misma de nuestra humanidad, Sonia.
    el dolor estara ahi, lo que debemos hacer con la escritura, es compartirlos con otros seres humanos.

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  3. Dios que fuerte! =(
    ánimo, celebremos por los que estamos y que aun estamos =)

    besos!

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  4. It's harsh... very... But we have to trust God...

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  5. Ella tiene lo mejor del mundo, fortaleza. Aunque desconozca lo que tiene o lo sepa, no importa el caso. Pero ella a mi me deja con orgullo: orgullo del soportar esa penuria interna, batallando desde jóven con esa enfermedad.

    Por cierto, ese es el nombre que le pondría a mi futura hija, si la tendré, claro. Es mi favorito.

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  6. En manos de dios todo es posible.

    http://www.remarcado.com
    http://remarcado.blogspot.com

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  7. Hola Sonia,

    Que lindo es escribir lo que nos sale de adentro don't you think? A veces me pregunto que tanto sufriste con la pérdida de tu amiga. Las veces que la mencionas en tu blog dan fe de lo mucho que duele perder a un amigo, y de lo incómodo que a veces resulta aceptar que la vida a de seguir sin ellos, de lo incómodo que resulta aceptar lo afortunado que somos los demás de vivir para contarlo.

    Gracias por tu último comentario en mi blog. Para la próxima te pido que no te limites por favor, que leerte es un placer.

    Un saludo

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  8. Sexydaisy,
    I lived through it. I now how hard it is. I saw my friend get consummend by cancer at very young age... I She was a non-biological sister for me, and I lost her five months ago. I am sorry to hear that you are going through that. I wish you the best for you and loved one.

    Sofía es a little girl I met yesterday. She is four years old and she has cancer.

    dirat,
    Hoy tengo muchas ganas de llorar; y me pregunto, ¿qué tanto tiene esto que ver con Sofía?.... Tal vez no tanto... Me causó mucho dolor ver a una nenita con esa enfermedad porque sé lo que va a sufrir :-(; pero creo que el problema es que no he cicatrizado la herida de la muerte de mi amiga.

    Sandy,
    Tienes razón! Celebremos aunque sea con el corazón roto.

    Joan, si tuviera una hija ése sería su nombre pero como no tengo, espero que un sobrino que viene de camino sea nena, y que mi hermano le quiera poner ese nombre. Creo que es un nombre precioso.


    Emilia,
    No te imaginas cuánto. Life is tough.

    ReMarcado,
    Ojalá.

    Luis,
    Pues si lo es; si no escribiera creo que ya habría sucumbido ante la vida; escribir es un mecanismo de defensa a veces -como en este caso.

    Sufrí y aun sufro la falta de mi amiga. Tanto que en este post es la primera vez que menciono su nombre; hace como dos meses finalmente pude borrar su información de mi agenda electrónica -no tenia corazon para hacerlo, era como desprenderme de lo ultimo que me quedaba; recientemente he vuelto a desayunar en el lugar donde ella y yo solíamos hacerlo los fines de semana; y así poquito a poco; pero es una perdida horrible; sientes un vacío y no logras entender por mas que trates que ya esa persona no está -aunque yo estoy conforme con su muerte porque por lo menos dejo de sufrir...

    El placer es todo mío. Espero las historietas, déjate de flojera.

    Besos y abrazos para todos!!!

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  9. Is so sad when a sickness like this happens to children. I really don't understand. I want to have faith but another part of me fights against it.

    Sorry.

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